Open any person you know's closet and you're sure to find at least one pair there (and no, jeggings don't count, nor do leggings with faux pockets and rivets spray painted on them). Jeans hit their peak popularity when cool boys like James Dean and Bruce Springsteen wore them and made them look super sleek and well, Kanye wears them and it still doesn't look like they're going anywhere soon. They're just pretty darn difficult to shop for if you don't know what styles, cuts and type of denim suit you best. Not to worry, your weekly update on clothing to suit you is here and we're going to smash this out of the ballpark. Let's get going …
Best jeans for your body shape if you're an hourglass:
So you have a small waist and a Beyonce booty; you probably find that your jeans gape in the back, huh? Yep, what you want to do is go for jeans with a bit of stretch that sit higher on the waist to cinch that in. To balance out your proportions you can wear a slim leg or skinny jean with heels — you want the hem to be long, but not too long; if it's too short or too long, it'll make your legs look shorter than they are. That's the point where you get your lovely sales assistants a shout out if you need a second opinion. If you don't want to draw attention to your hips and thighs, stay away from lighter denim or denim with any kind of whiskering or distressed look as that will draw attention to them.
You're straight up and down:
Boyfriend jeans, skinny jeans, mum jeans … you've got dibs on the lot. If you want to accentuate your thin pins, reach for the skinny jeans. If you're looking to detract from your legs, opt for a boyfriend jean, which will give you a relaxed, ‘I'm not even trying’ look. You probably want to stay away from jeans that are too straight or shapeless as you might get lost in them. Go all in on this one; commit to the really skinny or the really baggy (not like MC Hammer baggy, let's not get crazy) and you've got this, erm … in the bag.
You're a pear (not a real pear — though delicious, probably not ideal as a body type):
Hey, ladies, you want to take a cue from the hourglass girl and go for a slim, skinny or boot cut jean. When shopping for bootcut jeans make sure they don't flare out a crazy amount; you want it to be subtle, less John Travolta circa Saturday Night Fever more ‘oh, those are boot cut jeans?! I didn't really notice 'til you pointed that out’. The reason for this is because a big flare has a tendency to make your legs look shorter, unless you have long, gorgeous Candice Swanepoel legs in which case, who am I to advise you not to go Travolta all the way!
Hope this helps a lady out. There are a few simple things to keep in mind when going jean shopping. Always buy half a size down (wiggle into them, they will stretch!), get them altered about 1 cm longer than you normally would because they tend to shrink in length after first wash (also don't wash them too often, it makes the denim sad and they live longer if you wash them less frequently) and finally, don't give up trying on jeans if the first pair doesn't work out; most people need to try on heaps of pairs before they find the perfect pair.
It's kind of like dating: you just keep going till you find the perfect fit. See? Jeanius.